Okay - hands up - who here has ever had the urge to full on kiss someone they were hugging?
Good, you can put your hands down now.
I was worried I might be the only one.
And to those of you who didn't raise your hand... well, this post may seem a little strange to you.
So lately I've been noticing that I get these really inappropriate urges to kiss people that I just shouldn't. Before you start to worry I haven't ACTUALLY kissed any of these people. I don't think.
Let me explain a little.
I have a lot of friends; and by that I mean I know a lot of people who I hardly ever see and don't really talk to, but that I don't really hate and who I don't think hate me.
Conversely I only have a small handful of good friends (not including my family). These are the people I text, occasionally call, and even sometimes get to visit or see or hand out with.
They're also all guys.
Now, I don't hate women. Not in the slightest. I work with a lot of really great women/girls who I love spending time with at work. But when it comes to real friends (outside of work/school) I've both not had that many girly friends, and not stayed in touch with any of them either. I could explain why, but in short I just drifted apart from them due to not being bothered about their drama's.
And yes - most girls/women I know have CONSTANT drama's going on. Including myself.
So yeah, back to my point. I have a few really good friends and they're all guys. Some of them are ex boyfriends, some of them are friends I made whilst in a relationship and who wouldn't touch me with a barge poll in that way. Some of them are the kinda guys you sort of flirt with but never in a serious way and you just kind of hope they aren't actually into you because that'd be a sad, sad day.
To put the rest of this into perspective I should say I'm a very tactile person.
I like to hug, to high-five, to sit with my legs over other peoples, to tickle, to stroke, to be close in general. Only with my close friends, like, but yeah - uber cuddly person right here.
I'm also a little orally fixated, which explains a lot about my waist line and is one of the biggest reasons I'm glad I never started smoking. I chew bubble gum, eat tic-tacs, drink through staws - anything to keep my mouth occupied. I was probably even one of those babies that kept putting stuff into their mouth up to a rather old age.
So you add these three things together and you get me, stood hugging one of my friends, desperately trying not to kiss them.
It's so freaking awkward I can't begin to explain.
Because how do you react to one of your mates just randomly reaching up and kissing you?
I don't know about you - but that would seriously freak me out.
Like "Woah - what the hell? I thought we were just friends! What are you doing? Get your mouth off me freakazoid! RAPE! RAPE!"
Okay, maybe that's a slight extreme exaggeration.
But still!
I put it to you - Would you be freaked out by a friend kissing you whilst you were giving them a platonic hug?
I mean, it's not like a grope or something. That'd be way creepy and rude. It's just a kiss.
So why does it feel like such an intimate thing?
What is it about our mouths that makes them such no-go zones for everyone but our partners?
Maybe it's just because they're so sensitive.
I mean, the closest thing in sensitivity must be something like your genitals - surely?
So maybe that's why we're so careful about who gets to play with our lips...
Or maybe we're just so socially conditioned as to who we're supposed to kiss and when and where that it seems so totally wrong to kiss people if we aren't "in-love" with them.
Or maybe I'm the only weirdo who actually gets these urges.
We shall see.
This rant was brought to you by the power of magical interwebs.
Don't forget to tip your local Pagan Broadband for their assistance in this matter - mages have feelings too.
Yours, as ever,
Lolly
PS. A rant is for Christmas, not just for life...
Good, you can put your hands down now.
I was worried I might be the only one.
And to those of you who didn't raise your hand... well, this post may seem a little strange to you.
So lately I've been noticing that I get these really inappropriate urges to kiss people that I just shouldn't. Before you start to worry I haven't ACTUALLY kissed any of these people. I don't think.
Let me explain a little.
I have a lot of friends; and by that I mean I know a lot of people who I hardly ever see and don't really talk to, but that I don't really hate and who I don't think hate me.
Conversely I only have a small handful of good friends (not including my family). These are the people I text, occasionally call, and even sometimes get to visit or see or hand out with.
They're also all guys.
Now, I don't hate women. Not in the slightest. I work with a lot of really great women/girls who I love spending time with at work. But when it comes to real friends (outside of work/school) I've both not had that many girly friends, and not stayed in touch with any of them either. I could explain why, but in short I just drifted apart from them due to not being bothered about their drama's.
And yes - most girls/women I know have CONSTANT drama's going on. Including myself.
So yeah, back to my point. I have a few really good friends and they're all guys. Some of them are ex boyfriends, some of them are friends I made whilst in a relationship and who wouldn't touch me with a barge poll in that way. Some of them are the kinda guys you sort of flirt with but never in a serious way and you just kind of hope they aren't actually into you because that'd be a sad, sad day.
To put the rest of this into perspective I should say I'm a very tactile person.
I like to hug, to high-five, to sit with my legs over other peoples, to tickle, to stroke, to be close in general. Only with my close friends, like, but yeah - uber cuddly person right here.
I'm also a little orally fixated, which explains a lot about my waist line and is one of the biggest reasons I'm glad I never started smoking. I chew bubble gum, eat tic-tacs, drink through staws - anything to keep my mouth occupied. I was probably even one of those babies that kept putting stuff into their mouth up to a rather old age.
So you add these three things together and you get me, stood hugging one of my friends, desperately trying not to kiss them.
It's so freaking awkward I can't begin to explain.
Because how do you react to one of your mates just randomly reaching up and kissing you?
I don't know about you - but that would seriously freak me out.
Like "Woah - what the hell? I thought we were just friends! What are you doing? Get your mouth off me freakazoid! RAPE! RAPE!"
Okay, maybe that's a slight extreme exaggeration.
But still!
I put it to you - Would you be freaked out by a friend kissing you whilst you were giving them a platonic hug?
I mean, it's not like a grope or something. That'd be way creepy and rude. It's just a kiss.
So why does it feel like such an intimate thing?
What is it about our mouths that makes them such no-go zones for everyone but our partners?
Maybe it's just because they're so sensitive.
I mean, the closest thing in sensitivity must be something like your genitals - surely?
So maybe that's why we're so careful about who gets to play with our lips...
Or maybe we're just so socially conditioned as to who we're supposed to kiss and when and where that it seems so totally wrong to kiss people if we aren't "in-love" with them.
Or maybe I'm the only weirdo who actually gets these urges.
We shall see.
This rant was brought to you by the power of magical interwebs.
Don't forget to tip your local Pagan Broadband for their assistance in this matter - mages have feelings too.
Yours, as ever,
Lolly
PS. A rant is for Christmas, not just for life...
